Thursday, April 30, 2009

Live long and go fuck yourself.

Am I excited about the new STAR TREK movie? You bet your saggy tits I am. There was once a time that I would not mention this in public. I would hang my head and laugh uncomfortably, much in the same way I would imagine a closeted homosexual would, whilst the jocks took the piss out of my beliefs and feelings in front of all the pretty girls and boys. You know what? The tables have turned my friends.

Now all the jocks that thought they were king shit back in the day find themselves not playing sports so much these days, but watching them. and as for their hottie cheerleader girlfriends/wives. Well...

Best of luck with that.

While you're taking a moment to ponder the last time you actually saw your dick, ponder this. An entire legion of nerds, myself included are going to go to the opening night of this movie, not with this gal,

but rather these gals...

A-Holes: Zip

And by the way, A-Holes, make sure you put enough butter topping on our popcorn when we come through the concession line. We'd hate to have to speak to your manager.

and also...

Assholes, I present...YOUR MOM.

(This is a picture of your mom about to blow my little cousin's best friend. After she made them lunch, in between them playing rounds of Guitar Hero, right before she has to stop to run to the bathroom and take a monster crap because she had "too much Sanka this morning" and not too long before your dad leaves her for one of his "drinking buddies.")

The needs of the many out way the needs of the few...or your mom.


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